Miley Cyrus and negros for hire

When Miley Cyrus released her new song, “We Can’t Stop”, I was among the first to slam the record for its blatant imitations of all the wrong aspects of Urban culture. Now, just hours after the song rocketed onto the Billboard Hot 100 at #11, its writers have confirmed that Cyrus intentionally sought a “black” sound for her career reinvention.

“When you listen to the Miley Cyrus record that we did, it’s not ratchet but it definitely has a lot of Urban feel to it,” explained the Planet VI writing duo (formerly known as Rock City) to Vibe in a simple yet startlingly revealing interview. “She was like, ‘I want Urban. I just want something that just feels Black.’”

“WHAT did she just say?!”

Let’s repeat that last line just in case the dense fans of Cyrus, who refuse to accept the fact that their favourite artist is blatantly exploiting Urban culture, missed it: “I just want something that just feels Black.’” Take a moment to let those words sink in. Do you feel them in your spirit? Did they strike a chord in your moral centre?

“We Can’t Stop”, which was produced by Mike WiLL Made It for the highest bidder, was originally crafted for Rihanna but she passed on the record. Cyrus, on the other hand, was happy to claim the song as her own as soon as she finished “twerk” practice for her appearance at the Juicy J concert. She has since endured widespread backlash from conservative parents and people with enough sense to detect a fraud when they see one.

Who knows what Cyrus will do next? Hopefully, she will demonstrate a true appreciation for the Urban community by learning about other aspects of the entailed subcultures, beyond the wild antics she observed while surfing YouTube on that fateful Sunday afternoon when papa Billy Ray was busy watching football in the other room. While I do my “I told you so” dance, watch Trini Trent TV address Cyrus below:

Thoughts?